Introduction
Bfriend has filled a big gap in services for people who are
questioning their sexuality/gender identity and those who are contemplating coming
out - to themselves and others.
Bfriend was externally evaluated in 1997, the evaluation concluding
that the Project:
"was clearly meeting a demonstrated need for people
who are questioning their sexuality or who are in the process
of 'coming
out'."
(Jo Baulderstone,
Flinders Institute of
Public Policy and Management)
Same sex attracted, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, intersex and
queer people share a common experience of that time in our
lives
when we
came
out...
to ourselves.... to family... to friends. And many of us
share an experience of having decided not to come out to other
people.
We know about the difficulties experienced when questioning
our sexuality/gender identity and how hard it can be to tell other important
people
in our lives.
We know too, that coming out is not a single moment where we
wake up and decide that today is the day... I will come out and
it will be alright by tomorrow. We know that it can be a time
of great vulnerability. Many of us have to cope with rejection
and feeling isolated with no one to talk to about our feelings
or answer our questions. As a consequence of this, it often feels
like there is nowhere to go to break the isolation and get support.
In Adelaide Bfriend is an avenue to break the isolation.
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What
does Bfriend do?
What does Bfriend do?
Bfriend provides that support in several ways.
When you contact us initially you are free to talk with the
Project Worker without committing yourself to anything. This
can be done on the phone, via email or by coming into the Bfriend
office. Whatever makes the most sense for you and you feel
safest with.
During those conversations you can ask questions, maybe talk
about your feelings for the first time with someone who will
be pleased that you are exploring your sexuality or gender
identity. If it feels like Bfriend is a service that can be
of use to you, then we look at linking you up with a volunteer
for continuing support. This is the heart of Bfriend’s
work
All of our volunteers are people who are same sex attracted/
transgender. Some are people who have received support from
Bfriend in the past. They have participated in a comprehensive
training course so that they are aware of their role and the
types of support newly identifying people might need.
What our volunteers offer is someone to talk with; ask questions
of; help make sense of the GLBT ‘community’; to
accompany you to events you may be interested in; introductions
to the broader community and other things that are important
for you in your exploration. These things are discussed between
you and the project worker when you feel ready to be linked
up..
During the link up, a project worker will be in regular contact
with you to make sure the link is going well and you are feeling
OK about it.
Other ways that Bfriend offers help is through regular groups,
quarterly Forums and separate monthly social gatherings for
women and men
We run groups that go over a longer period. Examples of groups
we’ve run in the past are:- a married women’s group;
a group for bisexual women; a group for isolated men; a coming
out group for men; a fathers group; a group for women coming
out in their 40’s and 50’s.
The Forums are one off sessions on things that are of interest
to newly identifying people like coming out, relationships,
homophobia, sexuality and spirituality, health and sexual issues.
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Who
can get support from Bfriend?
Newly Identifying People
Bfriend is a state-wide programme in South Australia. We have
strong connections in Mount Gambier and Port Lincoln. The majority
of people who seek support live in the metropolitan area of
Adelaide.
Women, men and transfolk of all ages are able to get support from the
programme. We are mindful that many people are questioning
their sexuality/gender identity whilst others are in the process of coming
out. Our support to you is based on where you are in that journey.
There is no pressure to come out for someone who is questioning
their sexuality/gender identity and we know that this is a very personal decision.
We work with a wide variety of people, e.g. those who are
still at school, in a marriage or heterosexual relationship,
single parents, single people and from Culturally and Linguistically
Diverse backgrounds.
Parents and Family Members
Any parent who has found out that their son or daughter is
same sex attracted, transgender or intersex can be supported by a parent volunteer.
This support is also available for other family members who
want to understand and support their relative.
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Bfriend
Yahoo Groups
The Bfriend Isolated Women’s group is for women who
live in isolated regions of South Australia or for those women
who find themselves isolated for reasons other than where they
live. To join the group you need to have a Yahoo membership
(which is free) and then go to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Bfriend_IWG/
The Bfriend Isolated Youth Group is for young people who live
in isolated regions of South Australia or young people who
find themselves isolated for other reasons. To join the group
go to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Bfriend_IYG/
Once you have joined the groups there is the opportunity
to chat with other members, share experiences, discuss issues
and make connections. The Bfriend Project Workers act as
the moderators for the group.
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The Bfriend Culturally and Linguistically Diverse Communities Project
Over the past few years, Bfriend has been working with SHine
SA and RASA Peace Project to increase its understanding of
SSA Culturally and Linguistically Diverse people (CALD) and
in July 2005 recruited a CALD Project Worker to work on the
relationship between sexuality and culture. Bfriend has also
provided training on SSA and its relationship to culture for
the past four years.
The CALD Project has worked on the following projects:
Info-Card Project
The Bfriend Info-Card project designed, produced and distributed
pocket-sized information cards with succinct information about
same sex attraction (SSA) aimed at young people from Culturally
and Linguistically Diverse Backgrounds (CLDB).
Multicultural workers afternoon tea and information
session
The Bfriend CALD Project in collaboration with SHineSA proposes
to hold an afternoon tea and information session for multicultural
community workers who work with young people in their communities.
The information session component of the event will cover issues
of sexuality in relation to culture and provide information
about the Bfriend CALD Project and the various projects of
ShineSA.
CALD Parents Group
The CALD Project is currently working with the existing Parent’s
Group to look at ways of developing a similar group for parents
from CALD backgrounds.
Advocacy
The CALD Project is also involved in advocacy throughout the
multicultural sector to raise issues of sexuality and its relationship
to culture.
Resource Kit
A resource kit for multicultural workers has been
developed. This will cover issues of sexuality and gender diversity
and will also contain key contacts and referral points for
workers.
Bfriend Trans Project
Over the past few years, Bfriend has been working with an increasing number of people who are trans identified or questioning their gender
identity and in October 2007 recruited a Trans Community Worker to work with those people who are questioning their gender identity.
Further, the remit of the Trans Community Worker is to develop the Trans Project in a way that fits with and honours the trans community.
The Trans Community Worker is also available to provide training on gender and its relationship to SSA.
Contact
To find out more about the Trans Project, contact:
Karen Poulten, Trans Project Worker - Bfriend
Phone: 08 8202 5894
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Does
it cost?
Bfriend is a free and highly confidential service.
How
do I contact Bfriend?
You can contact us by calling:
Fanny on (08) 8202 5805, Paul on (08) 8202 5192 or Karen on (08) 8202 5894.
We have a voicemail facility so if we are
not immediately available you can leave a message if there
is a safe number
for us to call
you back on.
The fax number is: (08) 8202 5807
Our mailing address is:
Bfriend
UnitingCare Wesley
Adelaide
10 Pitt Street
ADELAIDE SA 5000
Our email address is:
bfriend@ucwesleyadelaide.org.au
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